


Who Ya Gonna Call?

by EndangeredMind



Category: Ghostbusters (Movies 1984-1989)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-14
Updated: 2019-02-05
Packaged: 2019-10-10 06:27:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17420795
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EndangeredMind/pseuds/EndangeredMind
Summary: Joe and Barry are apprentices of the famous Ghostbusters. Their first task? Looking after Ecto-1 whilst the experts deal with a ghost infestation





	1. Guarding Ecto-1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [EternalPun](https://archiveofourown.org/users/EternalPun/gifts).



Ecto-1 sped down the road. Inside of the famous hearse were the original four Ghostbusters (Peter, Raymond, Egon and Winston), as well as two new accomplices who were currently in training. Their names were Joe and Barry. Barry was a very well-built guy, and he loved showing off his muscles, whilst Joe was on the larger side, and he was currently squeezed into the backseat, between Raymond and Joe. The backseat was out use as it was currently filled to the brim with all sorts of ghost catching gear, otherwise it would’ve been the perfect place for Joe to sit.

Arriving at the building, they could see that it was practically swarming with ghosts! As the four vets got out of Ecto-1, Raymond turned to Barry and Joe. “I want you to take care of Ecto-1 and look after him. Think you can do that for us? It would be really appreciated!” He smiled at them, giving them a wink when they both eagerly agreed. After all, who wouldn’t want to be able to say they helped the Ghostbusters by looking after their prized possession whilst they went off to do their job capturing ghosts? It was an amazing opportunity!

Joe and Barry were now sat inside Ecto-1, watching as the four went inside the building to begin battling the ghosts. They watched in amazement as the ghosts began to slowly dwindle in their numbers. This was amazing, and they couldn’t believe that they had been picked out of all those possible candidates to work alongside such amazing people! They were going to tell their friends and families about this when they got home. “Dammit, I am so bored!” Joe sighed, causing Barry to shoot a dirty glare at him. How could Joe be bored whilst he watched the Ghostbuster? 

Inside the building, beams were being fired left, right and centre, as the four attempted their best to bring all the ghosts under control. Slowly but surely, they were winning, and the traps were filled with ghosts as they were captured, causing some of the ones that were still there to start scattering in different directions, trying their best to avoid being captured. Most of their attempts were in vain, but one lucky ghost managed to escape their grasp, smirking as it saw how frustrated the Ghostbusters were as they tried their best to get it, but to no avail.

Meanwhile, Barry and Joe were sat inside Ecto-1, and they were debating what to do to pass the time. Joe groaned as his belly started rumbling. He had eaten something at Taco Bell that was not agreeing with him. “I knew I shouldn’t’ve eaten that taco!” He groaned, protesting the noise his belly made as it gurgled and glorped, trying to digest the food without causing Joe too much pain, as his stomach continued to make all sorts of noises. Joe leaned back in the seat, huffing. He wanted a better view! He then moved to the front seat, smirking.

Barry was still in the backseat, whilst Joe was now in the driver’s seat, smirking as he sat down on the plush bench seat. It was so comfortable! The feeling was promptly shattered by a loud PPPRAAAAPPPP coming from Joe, who smirked as he let a loud one rip, causing Barry to groan and fan the air as the interior of the car filled with a loud smell. To make matters worse, the windows were wound up, trapping the smell inside. “Dammit Joe, that fart stinks! The smell is unbelievable!” Barry coughed and groaned as he worked on a console.

Not to let Joe win after a simple fart, Barry lifted his leg and let out a massive BBRRRAAMMPPP into the seat, which creaked and swelled a bit as the gas was crammed into the fabrics. This turned into a farting contest, as Ecto-1 wobbled a bit from all the smelly farts that were crammed into its seats/ Joe and Barry were now ripping ass, the car’s interior filling with moist and stinky farts, causing a few stains to become visible on the bench seats. As the frequency of the farts increased, the seats bulged and rumbled loudly, creaking noisily.

Joe and Barry laughed as they continued to let rip some noisy and brassy farts, not caring about the noise or all the rocking and creaking that was coming from Ecto-1 as Joe rocked a bit from side to side, alternating what leg he lifted so he could let out some real wet and deep sounding farts, the seats getting more smells as the two ripped ass like it was no-one’s business, loving how the car smelt at this point. Barry began switching places on the back seat, making sure each part of it got enough farts pressed into it. 

The two didn’t care and continued going, the smell becoming foul as it clung to the seats, dashboard and some of the remaining gear inside Ecto-1. Joe laughed as he let rip a rather loud fart and the seat bounced and creaked, as if it’s telling him to stop now, because it was getting a bit too much. It was so bad that Barry started coughing, and with that, Joe smirked. “I’m the winner, because my farts are the worst!” He laughed and rolled down the window to allow the rancid smell to filter out of the car’s open window.

Whilst the two were busy laughing, the ghost that had given the Ghostbusters the slip flew out of the nearby building and loomed over the Ecto-1, a massive grin spreading across it’s fat face. It quickly began scanning over the large red and white Cadillac, looking for an entry point. It smirked cruelly as it lowered itself down behind the car, wanting to get into the perfect position before it would strike! Soon, Joe, Barry, Ecto-1, and the rest of Ghostbusters would not know had hit then until it was too late! This was going to be so much fun!


	2. Revenge is... Green?

Managing to get out of the window, the now escaped spirit was able to look at its strange surroundings, and it smiled as it saw the only car on the whole street sitting right below it, a Cadillac Ambulance. Slowly but surely, the large ghost made its way down behind the car, scanning over the sleek lines of the car and taking note of the interior. It seemed that this car had vinyl seats had been loaded down with extra things that the Ghostbusters used to capture the ghosts. Time for a little payback! The ghost slowly began to descend.

The ghost snickered as it floated down right behind Ecto-1, wanting to double check everything before it launched its master plan into action. It seemed that this model of Cadillac had been two exhaust ports, so it would make this job a lot easier. They were rather small, meaning that this would take more time to accomplish instead of a car with a single exhaust, but as the car had two of them, it would take only a few seconds longer to do it. It watched in curiosity as Joe and Barry were fiddling around, before it made its move.

Inside the ambulance, Joe and Barry were busy with their phones, with Joe listening to music, and scrolling through various tracks, trying to find a good one to listen to, whilst Barry was playing a rather simple, but addicting game on his phone. Unbeknownst to them, the ghost had slowly begun to insert itself into the exhaust port of the car. Since the engine was off, there was no noises to tell them that anything was off. “Will you just pick a song or turn your flaming phone off?” Barry growled, tired of hearing a different song every five seconds.

He would’ve continued his rant about how Joe was being annoying and rather pathetic with the song skipping, but several creaking noises were heard as the ghost continued to stuff itself up the hearse’s exhaust pipes, causing the car to start slowly swelling up as the ghost’s mass was slowly slithering inside it. “Did you hear that? Sounds like this thing is close to falling apart. I don’t see why they don’t scrap it!” Joe smirked, only to yelp as Barry punched him in the arm. “Be nice! You wanted this position, so live with it or go home Joe!”

Joe sighed and turned back to the console he had previously been working on, only to do a double take. Had that console just swollen a bit? No, he was just being silly. Consoles were inanimate pieces of machinery and they couldn’t grow or shrink! He shook his head and resumed his work, unaware of the massive ghost outside. Meanwhile, Barry had switched off his phone and he was relaxing back in the seat. “Ahh, since when did this car have such comfy seats? They were really saggy on the way here!” He looked around the car, feeling very confused.

The two men began to panic when they realised that the car was starting to swell up! “What the hell do we do now?” Joe gasped, breathing heavily as he tried to think of a way out of this endeavour, only for Barry to yelp as the car began to bounce and rock from side to side violently, sending the two back and forth. “How the hell do I know? Just find something to grab onto Joe!” Barry groaned, trying to find something he could grab onto without worrying about it being damaged, all while the ghost was laughing cruelly.

Due to Barry and Joe suffering from increased gas when they were scared, it didn’t take long for them to resume farting, filling up the car with foul-smelling gas. However, since Ecto-1 was currently being inflated, the gas instead helped the car to swell up faster as the gas was sent into the poor Cadillac’s bulging frame, which creaked and groaned as it continued to swell up, both from the massive ghost that was still being sucked up the exhaust pipe, as well as Joe and Barry’s loud and rather brassy farts, which only accelerated the car’s metal body swelling.

By this stage, the Ecto-1 was very swollen, and the car sighed and sagged heavily on its tyres, which were very overstuffed, the rubber creaking and groaning as it bulged and strained outwards, trying to keep all the air inside. The car’s suspension groaned as the metal frame continued to swell up, which made the car press down harder on the tyres. The ghost had almost been sucked up the exhaust port by this point, and the hood ornament and hood swelled out a bit more, as the engine creaked and swelled loudly as the ghost made itself at home.

The ghost was now finally inside the hearse, which looked like a blimped up parody, as if an artist had taken it and gone insane, deciding to see what would happen if it was full of air. Inside the building, the Ghostbusters sighed as they had all the traps near the door, and they picked them up, preparing to head out the door. “You think those two took care of Ecto?” Ray asked, looking at his teammates. “Of course, they did Ray! They were just looking after the car, what’s the worst that can happen?” Winston laughed, smirking at Ray. 

His smirk soon turned into disbelief as they walked outside, only to find a rather blimped up Ecto-1 and a very frightened Joe and Barry inside. “What the hell happened here?” He walked towards the ballooned-up hearse, his teammates were still in too much shock to move as they processed a fat, low slung hearse that was vibrating and rocking a small bit. Joe and Barry were still unable to say anything as the car bounced a bit, before a rather loud and brassy fart came out of the exhaust, sending a green-grey cloud of smoke into the air. **BBBBLLLRRRRTTTTTTPPPRRRFFTT**


End file.
